eyebrows and abundance

this time yesterday we were in mexico. today we're back in colorado.

slept in my own bed last night. aunt bea's back from her stay at star kennels, where she gets extra special loving 'cause that's where she was born. hound-dog lookin' lab she is!

life is good.

vacations are great. coming back home is also great.

we had a lot of fun, spent quality time with a lot of people we've grown to love like family, hung out a bunch with our kids, and received some truly life changing information.

i've heard michael losier speak before. i've read his book "The Law of Attraction" a couple of times and even done the exercises.

but i now know that i can hear the same information over and over and when i'm allowing transformation to take root in my life there will be a day when the light bulb actually turns on.

i'll get it.

whatever "it" is.

that allows me to relax when i'm open to teaching, trusting that i will "get" whatever it is i'm ready to receive.

i "got" something big from mr. losier this week and it has to do with abundance and being open to receiving.

michael recommends keeping an abundance journal.

i've never done that. although i probably did buy a binder, label it nicely with "Abundance Journal", maybe even put some nice dividers in it and then put it on the shelf and never wrote a danged thing in it. i also recall setting up an "Inspiration" subdirectory on my computer and setting up and "Abundance" file ... suspect it's empty too.

that's the game i play sometimes: "getting ready to get ready".

my friend shane said once "you've got to have a lust for the end result, not the process." admittedly, sometimes i enjoy the process. ahhh, but that's a topic for another blog.

but i got something when we did a little exercise during the Liberty conference as we were writing down areas of financial abundance in our lives. whether it's finding money on the ground or getting a free dessert with your dinner or getting an unexpected gift in the mail or winning the lottery ... it's all abundance.

so this is what happened. i got my hair "done" before the trip ... spiffy highlights and a nice haircut from my favorite hair-gal, Amy at HairArtz in castle rock. stop by and say hey to amy sometime. she gives awesome ho-hawks*. anyway, amy threw in a little eyebrow waxing just 'cause i'm her friend and all. and i felt really, really bad about it. guilty.

*that's 4-year-old-speak for "fake mohawk", by the way ...

as we're recalling incidents of abundance in our lives i thought about amy and the way i felt when she told me she'd comp'ed the eyebrow deal. i hadn't asked for it. i certainly didn't expect it. i felt guilty about about it.

in fact, i recall insisting "oh, you don't have to do that ... blah, blah, blah".

i tipped big to make up for it. which is cool, except when the big tip is driven by guilt.

which mine was.

suddenly i stopped writing during the exercise ...

i had the "feeling". that knowingness in my soul and in every cell of my body that i just got something huge.

in every area of my life i had been choosing to actually push abundance away out of guilt or some deservability issue.

when we were expecting both the kids, i received numerous offers for baby showers thrown in our honor.

i turned them all down. the very thought of it made me uncomfortable.

compliments? they'd embarrass me.

public displays of appreciation? i'm tongue-tied.

someone offers their assistance? i turn it down.

in fact, the morning of this exercise a great friend, samantha, had actually offered to watch my kids at the pool during the conference. our kids are all about the same age and have a great time playing together. the kind of kids that are easier to wrangle when they're all together because they are having so much fun.

what did i do?

i said "thank you thank you thank you - but, no thank you."

why?

because i didn't want to impose on samanatha.

that might make me look bad.

so, my kids spent 5 hours inside that day when they could have been playing in pool in the mexican sunshine because i couldn't graciously receive sam's offer - because i didn't want to look bad. because i chose not to receive her abundance.

i had actually been pushing abundance away from my life, and my kids' lives, because i hadn't seen my resistance to receiving.

ahhhh, i got it. i really really got it.

so i'm committed to keeping a daily abundance journal.

everyday.

evidence.

proof.

gratitude. the highest vibration.

i'm grateful for the abundance that i now see for the first time. it surrounds me.

i'm grateful that i'm on the court in my life ...

that i choose to surround myself with what's right and what's working ...

that i have a community of people who have taken a stand for me and for themselves ...

that i have a business that rewards me when i figure this stuff out!

that tomorrow will be better than today ...

that each and every day i'm getting better and better ...

that i can hear michael losier for the third time and receive such an empowering nugget of information for the first time.

for the Liberty conference ... which blew me away.

for being back home.

so here are some entries from today's financial abundance journal:

darrell, the dishwashing machine repairman, didn't charge me a trip charge this morning when my dishwasher was leaking.

aunt bea got free playtime at the kennel.

i opened my wallet a little while ago and i could swear i came home with the same amount of cash i left with.

there's a 5 figure check in my wallet itching to be cashed.

we have an abundance of clothes - albeit most of them are dirty right now - but they still smell like salt and sunscreen and pool water so we're technically still on vacation.

i could go on forever but aunt bea keeps bringing me toy after toy which is 5-month-old-lab-speak for "you throw stuff and i'll go get it and then we'll do that thing again and again".

here's to ABUNDANCE!

~aunt bea says "hey".