Pollyanna & The Blue Screen of Death

wow ... it's been nearly 3 months since i've re-visited this blog ... in that span of time my entire palm database disappeared - including my 3,000+ database of friends, family and business contacts and every important date and record of the past 5 years. just as i was coming to grips with that little upset i went outside to watch my husband shovel a little snow and came back to my computer in the grips of the "blue screen of death". thanks to some worm or caterpillar or something. the geek squad eventually bailed me out but the setback literally set me back.

i was enrolled in an online course to take my internet marketing skills to the next level.

didn't finish it.

i was involved in a mastermind group.

dropped out.

but today, i forgive myself.

in fact, i'm taking it one step farther.

i'm celebrating all the things i did right.

i can be a bit compulsive about organizing details. losing that much data and having a corrupted backup could have really freaked me out.

it didn't. i just dealt with it and laughed off the inconveniences.

it wasn't a life or death situation.

was i as efficient during those months of recapturing information as i could have been?

heck, no.

but today, i'm still standing.

i did get really present to something through this experience, however. and it's my heartfelt desire that you get "it" too.

it's got to do with our internal dialogue and being our own biggest cheerleader.

when i realized my backup was corrupted the little voice in my head starting chanting "stupid, stupid, stupid" ... maybe my little voice has visited your head on occasion ... you see, it's in those moments of stress that we have a CHOICE to either be out own greatest critic or our biggest cheerleader.

to date, i'd say the score looked something like this:

Critic: 100 Cheerleader: 0

i decided to change that with some really empowering internal dialogue ...

"wow, lori, you're really smart and resourceful, this situation will be resolved easily"

and then i found some stuff to be grateful for.

stuff like food, heat, healthy kids.

and then i got to be really grateful for something else. without this computer setback, that critic might have kept on with the color commentary about all the little things i did wrong. instead, i had an epiphany ... a knowingness in my heart ... that i could CHOOSE to turn that critic in to my biggest cheerleader.

and i get to CHOOSE that because i really hear that internal dialogue clearly.

do you?

man, there's been so much happening ... so much cool transformation ...

one of the reasons i haven't posted is i lost my little file with all my passwords in it ... finding my "blogger" password just wasn't a priority but it's GREAT to be back!!!